Truly
by RossLover2012
Summary: Ally Dawson has six months to live, and her mother sets up the meeting of her and the famous Austin Moon. Ally is against being pitied and is upset about the arrangement at first. Then Austin soon realizes there's something about Ally that draws him to her, but he doesn't know the whole truth about her condition. The heartbreaking love story through Ally's eyes. OOC. GIVE IT A TRY!
1. Chapter 1

I have three words that go through my mind on a daily basis; cancer fucking sucks.

I don't share those words out loud though, because we all know it, and we all think it enough anyways. Plus I try and show more strength than fear in front of my mother to stop her from worrying more than she already does. I don't like seeing her suffer the illness that is having a sick child. What a lot of people don't understand is the people around you suffer too. Sure, you are the sick one, going through all the bullshit, but it takes a toll on your loved ones too, and in my case I hate watching it.

There was a time when my mother was a healthy weight, and was happy, but I guess there was a time that I was happy and at a healthy weight too. That stopped two days after my fourteenth birthday when I was diagnosed with leukemia.

Now here I am eighteen years old sitting in my hospital bed, watching my mother pack my things because I am going home, and you'd think that's a good thing. I'm finally going home instead of spending months in the hospital getting treatments. Except the reason I'm going home is because there is nothing left for them to do for me. They said I have six months to live, a year if I'm lucky.

My mother is putting that fake happy face on and pretending like the doctor didn't just tell her the worst possible news. That the time is coming where she isn't going to be a mother and that she's going to be alone. My father left us years and years ago, and I'm her only child. What's going to be left for her when I'm gone? Sometimes that scares me more than dying.

I have always been positive and strong in front of her, but it's the nights when I'm left alone that I break down. I always wonder, why me, what did I do to deserve this. Why do I have to die so young? I mean, I didn't even get to really enjoy the rest of my young adulthood. I'm eighteen years old and never even kissed a boy let alone had sex with one. I never went to my senior prom, or graduated. I got my GED and that's about it. But I at least have my best friend Trish; she has lived a normal life and tells me about things that are going on. She comes to the hospital almost every day, bringing me magazines and snack foods.

She always tells me how pretty I am with my short hair that is in a pixie hairstyle. My hair is growing back now that my treatments have stopped. I remember the times I had my long brown hair that I used to always curl with a curling iron. Those days are long gone.

After we get home and get things settled, I follow my mother into the kitchen and sit at the counter island as she prepares dinner for us; one of my favorites macaroni and cheese. Though I'm not sure how hungry I am for it. I would never tell her that though.

"You know that Austin boy?" My mother asks as she cuts up a block of cheddar cheese.

I raise an eyebrow at her while twirling an apple on the smooth marble counter, "Austin Moon?" I question.

She nods, "Yeah that singer you're crazy about."

I roll my eyes, "I'm not crazy about him."

"Oh, that's why I hear you and Trish talking about how… what was it, drop dead sexy he is?"

I drop my jaw at her words and shake my head, "Please don't ever say that again."

She laughs and sets her knife down, "But really…"

"What?"

"How would you like to meet him?"

This time I laugh, "You know how I have always wanted to, but his meet and greets are way too expensive."

"I know, but what if you use your wish?"

I rip the stem off of the apple and throw it towards the garbage pail, hopelessly missing it, "My wish?"

"Yeah, you know, the make a wish foundation or something."

"You think I should wish to meet him, sounds desperate."

"Ally…" She says.

"Well I mean normal people wish to go to like Hawaii or skydiving."

"Not always. Plus, I know you'd love to."

"He isn't even going to be around here for months. He'd probably have a concert here by the time I'm…" I start but stop when her eyes goes wide at what I'm about to say. I shake my head, "Forget it alright?"She nods and goes back to what she was doing. I stare at the back of her small frame and sigh.

Later on, Trish joins us for dinner. I've always been thankful of Trish and how she loves to talk. There's never an awkward silence around and she brings out a real smile in my mother. I feel a little better knowing that she will still have Trish when I'm not here anymore.

"So I was thinking maybe we could all go shopping tomorrow?" Trish suggests. I shoot her a dirty look; she knows that I found shopping appalling.

"That would be fun." My mother says.

"Guys…" I say and they both look at me, "Did we forget how much I hate shopping?"

"Oh, that's right." My mother says, but she's acting weird about it.

"Well your mom and I could just go." Trish says.

"Oh?" I say.

My mother nods, "Sure, do you mind?"

I shake my head. I don't mind. Maybe this is Trish's way to get closer to my mom to prepare her for what's to come. I don't mind having a day to myself anyways.

"Are you sure you don't mind?" My mother asks.

I take a bite of macaroni and cheese, but I barely taste it, "Yes mom, I'm sure. Bring me back somehting nice." I say and they both laugh.


	2. Chapter 2

When I wake up the next morning my mother is already gone. A note lies on the counter, telling me she won't be back until late and that there are leftovers in the fridge. I throw the paper out and go back upstairs to get dressed. I put on a plain white v-neck top and dark jean shorts. The white shirt almost blends in with my pale skin, but I don't care anymore.

As I enter the living room there is a knock on my door. I glance at the clock; it's eight in the morning. We never have visitors, especially at this hour. I take a deep breath and walk slowly up to the door as they knock again. I open it up and stare at the boy on my porch, his hands behind his back shyly.

"What the fuck?" I ask.

He looks taken aback at my words and brushes the side of his neck, "Uh, Ally?"

I nod slowly and keep my eyes on him, "I'm…" he starts but I cut him off.

"I know who you are." I say harshly.

He smirks, "This is not how I am normally greeted."

"Well I don't enjoy when a pop star randomly shows up on my doorstep." I say, "Says no one ever." He adds with a smile.

I raise an eyebrow at him, clearly irritated. "I say."

He crosses his arms, "Oh. You're serious. You didn't know I was coming?"

"No." I say.

"And you're unhappy with me being here?"

I nod and he looks at me, confused, "But your friend…"

"Went behind my back and arranged this against my will."

"Oh… I'm sorry." He says.

I sigh, "You didn't know."

"Well since I'm here… Can I stay?"

I look him over and my heart aches. He's even more attractive in person and I mean he's right here in front of me, but that's only because he feels bad for me. All I wanted was to meet him like a normal teenage girl at a concert.

"I guess."

I gesture for him to come in and shut the door after he enters. I walk into the kitchen with him close behind and he takes a seat at the counter. I grab two water bottles out of the fridge and hand him one. This is just too weird, too casual.

"Where are your body guards?"

"They are in the car."

"What if I was a murderer?" I ask.

He laughs, "They trust you."

"Or maybe they figure some sick kid isn't a threat."

He pales a bit and unscrews the cap from his water, "You don't look sick."

"Thanks… I think."

He smiles, "I mean you look good."

I blush and look down at my bottle, "Thanks." I mumble.

"You have a very nice house." He says, looking around.

"Thanks, it's not hard to get a house messy when you are never home."

He nods, "Were you in the hospital a lot?"

I nod, "I was diagnosed when I was fourteen. So I've been in and out of the hospital for the past four years."

"That must be really rough." He says, scanning my face. And for some reason I believe him. I believe that he's not just making conversation. Or maybe he's a really good actor.

"It is. But I really just feel bad for my mom." I say, taking a seat next to him. He spins his chair around to face me, "Why?"

"Because she has to deal with this too, it doesn't just change my life, but it changes hers; bringing me to the hospital, staying with me, medical bills."

He nods, "That's true. But you are the one that deals with the worst of it."

"That's true, but she has to deal with the after part."

His expression turns into confusion, "After part?"

"She will be left alone when I die."

He shakes his head, "Well you shouldn't think about it that way. You could always get better."

I nod as I realize that he doesn't know my true condition. Which I guess is a plus; he didn't come here because he thinks I'm dying. He came here because he thinks I'm sick and that I want to meet him.

"So what's it like to be famous?" I ask him.

He laughs, "It sure has its perks."

"I bet." I say, taking a sip of my water. I suddenly feel dizzy, and I set my water bottle down too close to the edge and it falls off. I hold on to the edge of the table until my dizzy spells.

"Hey are you okay?" Austin asks, putting his hand on my shoulder.

I nod, "I'm okay now I was just a bit dizzy."

"Does that happen a lot?"

I shake my head, "No, but nothing is impossible."

"Well do you want to just watch some movies?"

I tilt my head to the side and look him over, "This is just way too weird."

"What is?" he questions.

I laugh, "Just going to casually watch movies with Austin Moon."

He laughs too, "Well I feel like I can be casual around you."

I smile, "Do you not normally feel that way when you do this?"

"Do what?" he asks.

"Visit sick kids."

"I usually go to the hospital and visit with them; I've never done this before."

"You didn't have to do this." I admit, standing up. He watches me carefully like I may fall down. I pat myself on the chest, "I'm fine."

"I wanted to do this." He says, and follows me into the living room. We have a flat screen television with a huge selection of DVDs I've collected over the years. There's not much else to do when you're cooped up in a hospital room.

"Want to watch this?" I ask, holding up the movie Divergent.

"Sure. I've wanted to see it. I don't have much time to go to the movies or anything, with tour and all."

I nod and set put set the CD in and sit next to him on the couch, "How did you have time to visit me?"

"I cleared my schedule for you." He says, smiling.

I roll my eyes, "Sure. And I purposely got cancer so I could get a personal visit from you."

"Ouch." He says.

"I'm just messing around." I tell him, punching him in the arm.

After the movie is over we go back into the kitchen and I make us turkey sandwiches. I nibble at mine while he takes large bites of his. Even the way he chews is attractive. Ugh, how annoying.

"You make good sandwiches." He says.

"Don't get used to it." I tease and he smiles.

"I hope I am doing your wish justice." He says, popping the last bit of food into his month.

"Well I mean it isn't really fair that I didn't choose this. I mean I could have gone sky diving or to New York City…" I start and he looks genuinely upset. I look at him confused.

"So you really didn't want to meet me?" He asks.

"I don't like when people feel bad for me. I don't even like telling people that I'm sick. I wanted to meet you under different circumstances."

"Well unfortunately this is the circumstance. It doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy it." He says, "I mean, look at me."

I roll my eyes, "Yeah yeah."

He smiles, "You're beautiful by the way."

I shake my head, "No way."

"Way." He argues.

"You should have seen me before." I say, "Guys actually liked me when I was in middle school. I was decent looking."

He laughs, "Whatever you say. What are we going to do next?"

"Uh I don't know. I could show you my room I guess." I say, shrugging.

"Sure." He says.

As we walk up the stairs, I feel him close behind me, "Hope you don't have me all over your walls. That'd just be embarrassing for you."

I laugh, "No sorry, not even one picture." I say as I open the door, revealing my plain room. The walls are white and there's nothing hanging on them. My purple flowered bedspread is the only colorful thing. I walk over and take a seat at the end of my bed as Austin looks around, "Very tidy." He says.

"Well I haven't spent much time in here in a while."

"That's right, I'm sorry." He says, taking a seat on my fuzzy chair.

"There's nothing to be sorry about." I say.

"So your friend Trish, you two must be close?"

I nod, "Yes. She's the only one that has stuck by me through everything."

"She's the only one?" He asks.

I nod, "Yeah and you know I don't really blame them. Why should they be burdened?"

"You aren't a burden." He says.

"Austin Austin Austin… You don't even know me."

"I know that no one should consider you a burden."

I shrug, "This world is fucked up Austin."

"I know." He says.

He pulls lightly at his red tee shirt and looks at me from across the room. I stare back at him curiously until he sighs, looking down at his phone that he just grabbed from his pocket. "What is it?" I ask.

"My manager, I was only supposed to stay until three."

I look at the clock and it's almost six, I laugh, "A little late?"

"Yeah I ignored his other texts."

"Why?"

He flips his phone around in his hands, "Because I have enjoyed hanging out with you."

I blush and look down at my boring carpet, "I've had a good time."

"Yeah for someone who didn't want to meet me." He teases.

I look back at him and shake my head, "Well thank you for coming." I say, standing up.

He stands up too and walks up to me, staring down at my tiny frame. I look up at him shyly and he smiles, "I'm glad I did." He says and pulls me to him in a hug. I freeze against his chest, and he pulls away a little bit, his arms still wrapped around me, "You know you want to." He says and I laugh, loosing up and hugging him back. I can't believe how good he smells, like heaven.

He lets go of me and shoves his hands in his pockets, "I hope everything works out for you." He says and I almost forgot what he meant. I almost forget for a moment, in that hug, that I was even sick. A knot forms in my stomach and I nod, "Thank you."

He turns around then and walks to the door. He stops in front of it and turns around once more to smile and wave. I bite my lip and wave back until he's out of sight. I walk up to my door and shut it quietly. I turn my back on it and slide down into a seated position and lean my head against the door. How can something so wonderful still feel so bad?

I meant Austin Moon, one of the most famous boys on earth, and we hung out like we've known each other for years. It just felt so normal, and wonderful. And for the first time in years I felt like a normal girl. Not someone who's dying. Unfortunately, like life, that happiness was only temporary.

I bite my lip harder to stop the tears from falling. I just want to be normal.


	3. Chapter 3

"How was it?" my mother asks the next morning at breakfast.

I swirl my spoon around my soggy cereal and shrug, "Fine."

She takes a bite of her toast and stares at me, waiting for an explanation. But the truth is I don't want to talk about it. I want to pretend it never happened. Because it's not like I'm ever going to see him again. It was just a wish, a special one day thing that I can remember until I die, which isn't long from now.

"Was he cuter in person?" She asks, and I have to laugh.

"Yes mother."

"I'm sorry if we upset you by not telling you."

I nod, "Yeah I was pretty pissed at first."

"But then you loved it?" Trish asks, appearing in the kitchen.

"No." I say.

She sighs and takes a seat next to me at the table, "Well why the hell not?"

"Well probably because after he left I remembered how shitty my actual life is." I say harshly, causing my mother to clear her throat and go back to focusing on her toast.

"Come on Ally, lighten up." Trish says.

"Lighten up?" I say through gritted teeth.

"Ally…" my mother starts.

"No. I am just so sorry I'm not in a great mood all the time. It's probably a side effect of you know; dying!" I scream and bang my fist onto the table.

Trish pales and I stand up so hard my chair almost falls over. I run upstairs and into my room, slamming the door behind me. I stomp over to my bed and lie down. I want to feel bad about my temper tantrum but I don't. And the sad part is Trish is so used to this that it won't even bother her. She'll be back tomorrow.

After I calm down and take a shower, I throw on sweatpants and a tank top before going downstairs and joining my mother in the living room. She is watching some old soap opera and eating popcorn. She hands me the bowl as I take a seat next to her, staring at the television.

"You okay?" She asks.

I nod, "How's the show?"

"As ridiculous as it always is." She says and I laugh. I never understood why she watched the show since she thought it was so stupid.

"That was pretty harsh of you earlier." My mother says.

"I know, but you know me."

"You're a moody bitch." She says, and we both burst into laughter.

After watching an all day marathon, she goes into the kitchen to start dinner and I head upstairs to my room to lie down until it's ready. I can't fall asleep so I scan through social media on my phone and a picture of Austin Moon pops up. It's from a popular magazine. He has a white button shirt on, that's halfway unbuttoned and he's holding on to the side of it to reveal more of his chest. He's smiling just a little bit and his hair isn't as long as it was yesterday. It must be an older picture, but it sure is gorgeous.

My mother and I eat dinner sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table and watch the evening news. I think that my mother and I get along so great not only because of how close we have gotten since I've been sick, but because she's young too. She had me at sixteen. Her and my father were together since they were in middle school. They were madly in love, well so she thought. They had sex for the first time and she got pregnant. He had a rich family, and was destined to be a success and a kid would get in the way of that, so he told her he wasn't going to have anything to do with me, or her anymore for that matter. But that's okay. I think we have gotten along just fine without him. I don't think he ever deserved her anyways.

"Do you think you will ever date again?" I ask her. She looks at me with a surprised expression and laughs nervously.

"Where did that come from?" She asks.

I shrug, "I was just thinking about how much of an asshole that Steven was to you and that you really haven't dated. I think you should, so you won't be lonely."

"I'm not lonely, I have you."

"Mom…"

She shakes her head, "Don't give me that you're going to be dead soon bullshit. We will worry about that when the time comes. What about you?"

"Huh?" I ask.

"When are you going to date?"

I laugh, "Why the hell would I do that?"

"Why not?" She asks.

"You know why." I say lowly. And that's the end of that conversation.

**One week later…**

"I can't believe you actually got me out of the house." I admit to Trish.

She laughs, "Well it's just the park. It's not a very big step."

"It is too." I say, tightly the shoelace on my converse.

She pulls into the parking lot and we walk slowly into the middle of it where there's a big fountain. There aren't many people around, just a few joggers and a couple walking their dog. It's the middle of the day so people are working or at school.

We take a seat on the edge and I can feel sprinkles of water hitting my bare shoulders. The sun feels nice on my pale skin and I close my eyes, taking a deep breath. "See, fresh air is nice." Trish says and I shake my head, laughing.

"Yes it is." A voice says suddenly, making me snap my eyes open.

And there he is, standing five feet away from us; black plaid shorts and a white tank top with blue lettering, sunglasses pressed against his face. Maybe some people wouldn't recognize him, but I could never miss that mop of blonde hair.

"Good lord." Trish says.

"Austin?"

"Sup?" He says and I shake my head, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I was in the neighborhood and wanted to see you and oh look here you are."

"Oh my god…" Trish mutters next to me. I shoot her a glare and stand up, walking over to him.

"Are you crazy?" I ask.

He takes his sunglasses off and looks down at me with a cheeky grin, "Why?"

"You visited me like you were supposed to, there's nothing about another visit. You don't need to feel sorry for me." I state, crossing my arms.

"Ally, I'm not visiting you again because I feel sorry for you. I wanted to see you again."

"Why would you want to see me again?"

He runs his hand through his hair and glances at Trish who is staring at him before he looks back at me, "Because I can't get over how good we got along, it didn't feel like I was just meeting a fan."

"Well that's what it was." I say blankly.

"I don't think so."

"Look Austin, you can't just show up like this. You could be seen."

"I don't care." He says calmly.

"You should probably…" I start but Trish interrupts. She pulls on my arm and shoots me a glare before turning to Austin and smiling, "There's a carnival tonight. We should all go."

He smiles, "Sure."

"You'll be noticed." I warn.

"I have many disguises." He says with a grin, "I'll meet you guys at Ally's house at seven." And with that, he's gone.

I turn to Trish and punch her hard in the arm, causing her to winch and rub it, "What the fuck was that for?"

"You're an idiot." I say.

"Why!" She asks, following me as I start to head back to her car.

"We can't hang out with him."

"Austin Moon wants to hang out with you; you'd be crazy to decline."

"Trish, he doesn't know how sick I am."

"What?" She questions.

"He doesn't know I'm dying. What if he wants to keep coming around? 'Oh by the way Austin I'm going to die soon so this friendship is going to be short lived'" I say in mock tone.

"You are such a downer." She says, "But I didn't realize he didn't know. But I don't think that should stop you from being friends with him."

"I think it's a great reason." I say.

After hours of Trish trying to make me dress up to go to the carnival, I finally agree to wear a blue flowered sun dress to shut her up. Every summer in my town there's a carnival on Main Street, it's pretty much a really big deal, the whole town goes, which makes it really stupid for us to bring Austin.

"I can't believe he came back." My mother says as we wait in the kitchen for him to arrive.

"I can't either." Trish admits.

I shake my head, "He shouldn't have."

"Oh come on, just have some fun." My mother says.

"So you're telling me to go have sex and do drugs?"

Her mouth falls open, "When did I say that?"

"I can read you." I say, shrugging.

She rolls her eyes, "You're mental."

"I get it from you." I say with a smirk, and then the door bell rings.


End file.
